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Thursday, February 24, 2011

Trust Issues

Some of my earliest memories involve being in the car with my family. We lived in southern Ohio... very hilly terrain... which facilitated exhilarating rides when Dad was driving. One second, you're sitting mesmerized in your seat with the sun flickering through the trees - in an almost hypnotic daze - then suddenly the road drops out from under the car and your stomach is in your throat! There were no seat-belts in those old vehicles, and bodies would be catapulting into each other... and the silent meditative state was interrupted with little girls squealing and my Mom's sweet, but firm voice - "Stanley". That was always her response... just "Stanley"... (being interpreted as "Why in the world do you always speed over these dips when you know you're going to cause chaos?")
Immediately, my sister Debbie would start begging, "Slow down Dad... please slow down!" (Debbie is four years older than me - and she was always trying to keep everybody calmed down and behaving... come to think of it, she still is!) However, when we hit that first DIP in the road - I knew that there were about five more coming before we got to our house... I would be hanging over the back of the front seat - yelping... "Faster, Daddy!Go faster - faster!" He couldn't get too fast for me! At four years of age, this was the highlight of my day! "Faster! Faster, Daddy!" Only Mom's steady repetitions of "Stanley" ...and Debbie finally melting into tears - kept Dad from shooting us off the side of the hill into outer-space! At four years of age - my Daddy was my Superman... I trusted him explicitly and believed with all my heart that he could do anything!
Flash forward ten years... traveling that same road - I remember holding a pillow in front of my face as I held my breath and prayed for God to get me out of the car safely away from this maniac driver!
What changed? I had the same Dad. He had not changed. But something had DEFINITELY changed in me! I just didn't trust him at fourteen like I had at four. No... he had never ran me off a cliff or lost control of the car... but I had a lot more knowledge about safety and limitations of vehicles than I had ten years prior. Had my wisdom caused me to lose faith?
For some reason I have been contemplating this question lately. 
Why is it so hard for us "mature Christians" to trust God?  
The new Christians have all the faith in the world! Us older and wiser saints, just smile and shake our heads as we observe their excitement and enthusiasm. We remember those days of unwavering faith! But what's changed? We still have the same God. He has not changed. 
Have we seen too many people die of cancer to believe that He is STILL the Healer? Have we seen too many marriages break up to believe that He can STILL revitalize relationships? Have we seen too many families file bankruptcy to believe that He can STILL perform financial miracles?
I know this... 
Knowledge is powerful. But knowledge must not compromise Faith! 
The knowledge of this world cannot comprehend the supernatural power of God! We must not allow our maturity level to squelch our trust level. I pray that God will give me the grace to keep on trusting Him - even though my understanding has been clouded by my knowledge...

Jesus, Jesus, how I trust Him. 
How I've proved Him o'er and o'er.
Jesus, Jesus. Precious Jesus.
Oh for grace to trust Him more.

Jesus said unto him, If thou canst believe, all things are possible to him that believeth. 
Mark 9:23  

And Jesus looking upon them saith, With men it is impossible, but not with God: 
for with God all things are possible. 
Mark 10:27

1 comment:

Darlene C said...

Excellent! How I have to trust Him..